I was working on a post when J came in the room and leaned over my shoulder to give me a smooch.
"What's that? You bored?" he asked, pointing to the big Escape from Dullsville header.
Damn. "It's my ... uh ... blog," I sheepishly admitted.
"You write a blog? Can I read it?" he pleaded.
"Ummmm, nope," I answered. After his incessant pleading, I read him a few of my posts. J gushed and thought the world of them before heading upstairs to watch Saturday Night Live.
Now I sit here, totally regretting sharing my blog with him. Not that I really care -- I actually enjoyed hearing him laugh at a few of my stories -- but I just don't want him finding it on the Web on his own or telling his friends or family about it. What's the point in writing somewhat anonymously if people know where to find you?
One of the reason's I moved to Blogger from MySpace (besides being over the age of 13) was so that I could write about anything and not have to worry about censoring my stories. This has become my "safe place". And you guys know, it's not like I ever write anything detrimental or completely inappropriate -- but I would like the option.
I had a post I realllly wanted to share tonight as it's not something I have the nerve to bring up in front of my close friends or J yet ... and now I'm a little gun shy.
Should I be worried? Should I even care? Am I being dumb about this??
6 comments:
First of all, you're not being dumb. I feel like my husband (and my mother) edit what I write sometimes. They really don't, but the image of them cringing at something I'd say makes me edit myself. So, that's understandable.
Secondly...I'm over 13, and have a myspace. What does that tell us? ;)
Sidenote: As I was typing this freaking comment, he came in and started reading it. And is now mad. Ugh. You're so not being dumb about it.
I certainly don't think you're being silly -- Each of us has that "Safe place" -- A belief I have is everyone has the person everyone knows, the person your friends know, the person your spouse knows and then there's the person only you know... -- It's called boundaries (as I'm sure you're aware) -- Not silly... totally get it -- I respect what you're feeling --
There has to be a way to make sure people can't find your blog :)
I feel your pain. I told my boyfriend about my blog one day, and now he reads it and shows people at work. I don't mind, but it does make it impossible to complain about him!!
I don't think you're being silly. We worry about other people's feelings and such, so it's perfectly normal to worry about what you should post. Although it does put a damper on things. :(
You're not being dumb at all. Mot saw me blogging one night at home, and now reads it every once and a while. So, I had to start censoring how I wrote about him. I still do it, mind you, just a little more carefully. He's the only one in my family that knows about my blog, and I hope to keep it that way. It's nice having a place you can write what you feel, without worrying about hurting anyone's feelings.
I have an entire weekend to write about, and haven't yet, because of those that might read it. :-)
Go Bills!!
I dont think you are being silly. Though I dont think you should care too much either (unless you plan on writing very bad things you dont want anyone you know to read). You may feel a bit "invaded" now, but it will pass.
If you feel you need a very private, annoymous space maybe start a second blog to write down those secret thought.
:)
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